An exciting typical english class.

Currently I am sitting in English class, which is not as treacherous and mind-numbingly monotonous as usual due to an exciting new development: my teacher seems to have wagged the class. I think she's onto something there and I am starting to envy her for not being in here. Although it is not as loud as usual because an inordinate amount of my class seem to be absent, including the very loudest members, much to my delight. So, with little to complain about, I thought it might be beneficial (to no-one) if I blog about the events of this insightful and educational class.

At 2:15pm the bell rang, signifying the end of the delicious freedom of lunchtime and the start of a torturous hour. I sluggishly walked to my locker and shoved some books into my inconveniently oversized bag. Unfortunately I neglected to bring real work.

2:20pm. My class has assembled outside V3 and are discussing the likelihood of Ms. Barker being away, and how orgasmic that would be. Much to our esctasy, a substitute teacher whose body shape is remiscent of an apple on a stick materialises and opens the door, instructing us to file inside. Nobody does. She spends the next thirty seconds gently coercing us into entering the door of doom.

2:21pm. I ask if I can work in the VCE centre. "Have you read the book?" the teacher (who I did not catch the name of) demands.
"Yes."
"Have you done the questions?"
"Yes."
"All of them?"
"Yes."
"Well no, you can't leave this classroom."

2:25pm I go to retrieve a laptop from the laptop lady who is more than familiar with me now. Five or so students slowly file in, late.

2:35pm The laptop finally starts up and remains unfrozen long enough for me to open IE. I entertain myself for the ten minutes it takes by whinging about our school's insufficient resources.

2:40pm I realise that I can get on to MySpace from the school computers.

2:41pm I get bored of MySpace.

2:45pm The apple shaped teacher reprimands the class for foul language. If only she could hear us when half the class wasn't wagging. I begin to blog.

2:46pm A minty smell wafts through the room. This makes me think of mint slice biscuits. Which makes me think of chocolate. I could be eating chocolate but instead I am sitting in this stupid room with paper-thin collapsible walls. Life is not fair.

2:53pm One of the only people in the class who appears to be constructively doing work asks me how to answer a question. Unfortunately I can't help because when I did that question, I pulled the answer out of nowhere and seeded in irrelevant quotes.

2:58pm The apple shaped teacher gets up and leaves the room. The noise level within the depths of hell raises. All I can hear is "Ow, ow, stop it!" from two different people, in different circumstances. One of them stops. Presumed cause of death: boredom.

3:00pm I run out of things to blog about. Waiting until something else happens. I do the hard puzzle on Miss Bimbo.

3:01pm Several students erupt into song. I won't question it. Teacher walks back in and singing continues.

3:02pm One of the singing students begins to make the sounds that I make when I imitate my class. It sounds like "unhh-unhh-unnhhh-unhh" and can be imagined to be combined with hand action that resemble claps.

3:04pm The teacher takes the role. The fat role boy stands behind her, shuffling his feet and pacing. She finishes the role, several students ask if she has called their names as they weren't listening. The teacher begins to ask several people what their parents' first names are, professing that she went to primary school with them.

3:07pm I still cannot access Facebook. More singing from some of the louder members of the class. I am waiting for one of the Miss Bimbo games to load, currently it is not making much progress so I am not holding out much hope.

3:10pm I finally tire of sitting here and updating my blog. If I wanted to do that I would sign up to Twitter. Time to pack up.