I hate people whose eyes point in two different directions. I know they can't help it, but I can't help being repulsed by it. There is nothing worse than someone whose eyes point opposite ways. A little deviation isn't so bad, but if you find one eye looking forward and the other looking up, you have problems. Turn your eyeball around, for the love of god. Superglue it straight, or attach cables to it so you can control which way it swivels, whatever, just fix it for the sake of humanity.

Never thought I'd say this but I can't wait to get the fuck out of Melbourne. But it will be a fair few years at least before that will happen. Fuck you fashion capital, and fuck the people who live in you. One day, I will dump you for Sydney.